I don’t consider myself to be a good friend. I am dreadful at keeping in touch. I don’t remember birthdays or anniversaries or kids’ ages. Sometimes I even get their names confused.
I forget to call and email and send birthday cards. I have a LOT of unmailed cards at my house.
I don’t visit and rarely invite people over to my house. Even though I would love to do both.
I always have great intentions, but end up forgetting to make dinner when someone is sick or to put baby gifts in the mail. Then all of the sudden the “baby” is a preschooler and the gift is inappropriate. I find it stuck under a pile of mail or five other projects I started and didn’t finish.
This is why it amazes me that I have such great friends, who all put up with me and my shortcomings. But I guess that is what makes true friends. They are the people who love you in spite of all your faults. They are the people who choose to be there.
Most of my close friends are online. Sometimes it is hard to be so far away from all of them, to not be able to be there when you want to be. Although considering my track record with local friends this may be a good thing.
The week before last I had the opportunity to go to LA for BlogHer and spend time with some of them. It was glorious. I love my family, but there is nothing like being with people who have zero expectations of you.
They don’t care if you have bedhead. Or if you fall asleep and wake up crying because a friend’s father passed away and it welcomed grief into your life right when you were supposed to be anything but sad. They just give you a hug and tell you it will be okay. And get you coffee when you obviously need it.
They answer your stupidest questions and give you a well-deserved side eye when you need it. They laugh at you for your love of Buffy, but high five you when you get to meet her. They listen to your deepest secrets and offer sage advice.
They laugh and forgive and brave the freezing Pacific ocean with you. Even when it requires driving an hour in LA traffic.
I love them and they love me and that is all that matters. Those are all the things that make a good friend. And maybe, just maybe, I’m good at those things.
Thank you all so much for filling me up with love. I miss you all.
My amazing roommates, Elaine, Jasmine, and Erin.
My very best dance partner, Arnebya.
My sobbing over a movie sisters, Kristin, Angela, and Tonya.
My perfectly curly-haired angel, Leigh Ann.
My social media maven and capturer of amazing images, Melisa Wells.